A husband finds his way out of an unhappy marriage to an officious wife . It’s a funny story but quite how true it is, I’ll leave to you to decide. (Note the eighteenth century custom of capitalising the initial letters of the nouns.)
“An odd Accident happened last Week in Bedfordshire, about three Miles from Leighton, of the Truth of which we are well assured, viz.
A Man lately married, was so unhappy in his Bargain, that in a short time after he swore to his Wife, he would drown himself in a neighbouring Pond, in a Fortnight; which Time he thought was necessary to make his Peace with God. The Day fixed being come, the Man took no Notice of it; upon which his Wife officiously reminded him of his Resolution. To which he answered, that, upon second Thoughts, he could not drown himself, because that was Self-Murder: but if that she would throw, or push him in, he would stand on the Brink of the Pond, which accordingly he did; the Woman ran at him with all her Force, but he, flipping a little on one Side, in fell his Wife, and was drowned instantly. She was afterwards taken out and buried, to the no small Admiration of the Villages round about.”
The Stamford Mercury, 3rd January, 1745.