A couple tried to get one over the Lord Mayor and parish officers of Bishopsgate, causing some hilarity at the Mansion House, but the Beadle and Lord Mayor saw through them. The newspaper reports some of the conversation in the vernacular; note the pronunciation of Vs and Ws.
“MODEST REQUEST. – At the Mansion-house on Monday, the overseers of a parish were summoned by Mary Gush, a young woman who has been almost from her infancy a dependant upon parochial bounty. She stated that now she had an opportunity of making herself happy and independent for life, the parish officers of Bishopsgate refused to do their duty, in helping her out of her present degraded state. She had been “off and on” at the workhouse for 15 or 16 years, and at last a gentleman in the carpentering line, named Bill Flockton, axed her to be his wife: as she was tired of a single life, and Mr. Flockton had a matter of 14s. a week, she consented, and she applied to the parish-officers for their consent, but they refused (laughter). – The Lord Mayor – I didn’t know that the parish officers had the power to prevent you. – The Beadle said he never attempted to exercise any any such authority, but as these marriages generally aded to the burdens of the parish, he ought not to encourage them. – Miss Gush – Please you, my Lord, I don’t want to be no burden to the parish. I wants to cut it altogether, and I’m blessed if ever I soil a pump in the workus again. – The Lord Mayor – But if the gentleman you love really loves you, why doesn’t he take you off at once and marry you?- Flockton- Why, my Lord, you see when a man goes for to give himself to a voman wot comes off the parish, they gives a summut jist for to begin the world with: now, these here gentlemen won’t give no sich a thing, and they couldn’t expect I’d take a poor creetur like this ere to be my wife without a summut for a fort’n, for I a’nt a living man if I a’nt able to eat all my own wittles myself (laughter). – The Beadle – Their object is merely to get a pound or two, and to spend it in drunkenness. – Miss Gush – What a thundering lie! (a laugh). My Lord, this here dirty old Beadle wants to prevent people from being modest and wirtuous. It’s a shame to let such willains live – they deserve to be hanged up without judge or jury. Don’t they, Bill? (laughter). – Flockton – And no mistake. Please you, my Lord, it is this sort of consarn as sends so many poor creatures upon the streets what havn’t got no house nor home, nor nothing, barrin the flags for to stretch their bones upon. – The Lord Mayor – I am afraid that if the parish were to give you a fortune, you would not do much good with it. The lady’s voice seems to be rather affected, and it really sounds in my ears as if gin was the cause of it. (The young woman’s voice had that hoarseness which excessive drinking, if it will not give, is sure to perpetuate.) – Flockton – No, my Lord, the creetur got cold by sleeping in the open hair. – The Lord Mayor – I can’t compel the parish officers to give you a fortune. – Miss Gush – What, not a lousy two pound ten! Then I’m blessed if we don’t find a way to burden the parish without marrying at all; won’t us, Bill? – Flockton – Blowed if we don’t (loud laughter). – This promising couple then moved off, the carpentering gentleman having put on his hat before he left the room, while the Lord Mayor assured them that if they were ever brought before him for any offence, he should not forget their conduct that day. – It was stated that they have lived together in Petticoat-lane for the last twelve months.”
Stamford Mercury, 27th December, 1833.