Have you ever considered paying somebody to say what was well about you? Upon her death, a woman who lived in Clerkenwell requested just that. The hired preacher set a date and wrote the sermon. However, what he said during her funeral differed slightly from what the deceased had originally requested…
” A WICKED WOMAN.- In the licentious days of King Charles II. lived a woman of the name of Creswell, who kept a house of ill-fame, to which resorted Lord Rochester, and many other libertines. This wretch at length was seized by death, when she desired, by will, to have a sermon preached at her funeral, for which she ordered that the preacher should receive 10l.; but only on this express condition, that he was to say nothing but what was well of her. This was a quibbling age. A preacher was procured, not, it seems, without some difficulty; thus, then, he performed his office. His sermon had no reference whatever to her, it being on the general practice of morality; and he concluded with -“All I shall say of her, therefore, is as followeth;- She was born well, she lived well, and she died well; for she was born with the name of Cres-well, she lived in Clerken-well, and she died in Bride-well.””
Stamford Mercury, 31 October 1823.